Things Guys Do, But Won’t Admit To
27 Comments August 7, 2006 5568 Views
by: Ryan Murphy
Actor Gilbert Wells once observed, “The man who has no secrets from his wife either has no secrets or no wife.� Indeed, all men enjoy clandestine activities and guilty little pleasures they’d prefer the fairer sex never to discover. For some men, it’s as simple as indulging in a forbidden TV show, while for others these shameful activities include cruising for transvestites along Sunset Boulevard. Read on to discover the embarrassing things all men do, but will never admit to.
They groom
Let’s be perfectly honest: If the vast majority of men didn’t manscape, the number of urban sasquatch sightings would rise by at least 300%. Thankfully, that hasn’t become an issue since today’s trendsetting metrosexuals are shaving, waxing and plucking like never before. In fact, these ambitious “Mother Pluckersâ€Â? have created a male grooming market that exceeds sales of $3.5 billion annually. To put that in perspective, that’s more than the combined GDP of Liberia, Sierra Leone, Burundi, and Malawi — four countries where male grooming is admittedly less of a priority than outrunning wild boars.
They cry
When it comes to crying, men used to believe it was only admissible to shed a tear at
a) Your father’s funeral or
b) When hit in the man berries with anything larger than a breadbox.
However, there’s not a red-blooded man on the planet who hasn’t broken down during the closing moments of a sports film. That includes tearjerkers like Rudy, Bang the Drum Slowly and, yes, even two-thirds of the Air Bud trilogy. So, just how often do men cry? According to Dr. William Frey, a professor of pharmaceutics at the University of Minnesota, men cry an average of 1.4 times per month.
They consume girly drinks
Although few guys will admit it, there are certain times when an ice cold beer or a smooth glass of scotch simply won’t satisfy. That’s why they are increasingly wetting their whistles with festive girly drinks like lime margaritas, wine coolers and apple puckers. Sure these drinks might not be very manly, but you’ll never get a fun little paper umbrella if you keep on ordering Coors.
They refuse sex
Although it might seem preposterous, there are times when some men are simply not in the mood. According to recent statistics, 22% of men are more likely to refuse sex than their partners. Whether he’s too pooped to pop or he’s just listened to his mother-in-law discuss her yeast infection, not all men are sexual machines at all times.
They preen
For years, music lovers have debated who Carly Simon was singing about in her mega hit, “You’re So Vain.â€Â? Was it Warren Beatty? How about Mick Jagger? Although both men are likely candidates, Simon could easily have been singing about men in general. Like it or not, men are arrogant, boastful creatures more concerned with their appearances than they let on. Consider, for instance, that according to a recent survey, 19% of men said they wouldn’t mind being stupid as long as they had the perfect body — call it the Keanu Reeves Syndrome, if you will. That compulsive concern over their looks also extends to their hairlines, as 48% of men think balding has a negative effect on business and social relationships.
They watch chick flicks
It isn’t merely a coincidence that many of the best films from the past decade have been so-called chick flicks. From The English Patient to The Hours, these well-crafted cinematic gems contain a certain je ne sais quoi missing in movies like White Chicks. They have intense drama, they have keen character development and, sometimes, they even have cat fights.
Similarly, the reason Desperate Housewives has become one of the top shows on the tube is because it attracts a demographic that’s split among female and male viewers. And why not? The plots are fun, the dialogue is witty and the women are hotter than a snake’s ass on a wagon ride. Desperate Housewives is hardly a new phenomenon either. Even before Housewives premiered, shows like Sex and the City ruled the airwaves for the very same reason.
They flip through women’s magazines
No one ever wants to get caught reading an article entitled “7 Ways To Make Him Ache For You.� Nonetheless, we all peruse magazines like Cosmo and Marie Claire from time to time. After all, these pithy little publications offer us an intimate perspective into the female psyche. They teach us what women want, they instruct us on what women are thinking and, best of all, each issue contains more cleavage than the Grand Canyon. More than just glossy periodicals, they’re like psychology textbooks with boobies.
They display brand loyalty
Although most men scoff at the notion of brand loyalty, their closets often reveal a different sentiment altogether. Hit the links, for instance, and you’ll find many men are plastered with so many Nike swooshes that they look as though they’ve signed a multimillion dollar endorsement deal. In the end, men are attracted to certain brands for the same reason they’re attracted to the idea of love at first sight: It saves time.
They cuddle and use pet names
Get a guy behind closed doors with his partner and he’ll resort to an endless string of “darlings,� “pumpkins� and “cupcakes� faster than you can say “Gag me with a spoon.� In fact, some men use these pet names so much they end up sounding like a romantic form of Tourette Syndrome.
And where there are pet names, cuddling can’t be far behind. Luckily, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. A recent survey conducted by the Berman Center for Women’s Health in Chicago found that couples who cuddle have a closer emotional connection and are more stress-free. Sure, a good hug might not be as exciting as having sex with Norwegian twins on a trapeze, but if it helps you live longer, it can’t be all that bad.
They acknowledge other guys’ looks
Ask a guy about another man’s attractiveness and he’ll either
a) Tell you he’s never noticed,
b) Openly question your sexuality or
c) Run out of the room screaming, “Stay away from me, you hear me? Stay AWAY!”
That’s because they all think that admitting they find another guy attractive is like admitting they want to spend an afternoon in a Turkish bathhouse with Carson Kressley. Nonetheless, men do notice. They notice at work, at home and in the gym. Hell, they even notice in the bathroom, where even heterosexual guys have glanced at more packages than a UPS delivery man.
Source: Askmen.com
(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
Loading ...
Hello and welcome to JaypeeOnline! My name is Jaypee Habaradas and I'm the author of this blog that talks about the latest blogging news, WordPress theme and plugin reviews, technology, gadgets and tips & tricks.
Thanks for the comment I am glad you liked the Sand Scluptors. I also enjoy checking out your blog whenever I see it. Bill
haha. that was enlightening. though, id personally admit to some of those. i guess, this proves true for most guys.
ahehe i will never deny the fact na umiiyak ako. pramis. saksi ang aking mga unan. ahehehe
haha.. nice post..
Dropped by and read this very, very interesting entry. Thanks for sharing. As a woman, I am mystified by the so called counterpart species, men. And with all the macho image they project, I’ve always known there’s this vulnerable, unique homo sapien who will never admit something that can endanger this macho image
And just by reading this entry, I have assured myself that neither of the sexes are dominant. Just complimenting each other. And to guys who admit the above mentioned things, I admire you, for being true and for not thinking of what others may say
oh, men are so vain, too. more vain than women. could it be because of a study that each man has a 30% tendency to be gay?
interesting indeed, kudos for doing the dirty work and posting this well-written piece by mr murphy.
im one of the few guys who could cry on queue. it works on girls - 9 out of 10 times. chances are, youll win whatever the argument is. *hopefully they dont get to read this* haha. The crying card is a card rarely played, but it can potentially be beneficial.
hmmmm enlightening…lol
I do them all and I admit it! Even refuse sex! I get it so often sometimes I just too tired to do the deed. lmao
exchange links? i really dont mind sure i already link you please link me okay!
nagkukunsulta na rin kay doctora vicky belo ang mga lalaki
tsk, tsk… i guess there are a lot of things i have to discover myself *lol
or am i too young for those stuffs?
God bless!
thank you all for sharing your comments and opinions. sorry guys if i didn’t have time to reply to your comments right away. i was so busy this past few days. so here goes.
@bill - you’re welcome and thanks for dropping by!
@victor - likewise. i’m guilty to some of these things.
@eric - manhid lang ang hindi umiiyak. men also have feelings.
@zra - thank you.
@sayote queen - you’re most welcome. the “macho” image is a stereotype image created by a male dominated society and culture in the ancient days and has been passed on to generations. but as we all know, women nowadays enjoy more freedom and empowerment.
@bing - not all men are vain. men who are vain are either gay or what you call “metrosexuals”.
@benj - thank you. one piece of advice, never share your “trade secrets”. hehe. if that’s a technique you use on women, don’t share it. especially here coz i have a lot of female readers. anyways, women also have their own techniques and mind games, right ladies?
@meg - hehehe.
@trench - ROFL
@ang-ang - thanks! i already added you to my blogroll.
@cruise - oo naman. hindi lang naman para sa mga babae ang plastic surgery.
@paul - common, you’re not too young for these things. i’m sure you’re already guilty of some of it. hehe
I am sure there are things that hubby has never told me. Most likely something to do with my appearance like, honey, do you know you look very unattractive from this angle? bwahahah! Although he has told me some very shocking things about his past already and he’s pretty forthright about what he’s thinking. Let me ask him who he thinks is the best-looking male actor.
@tin - did the same thing and told my wife about things in my past that i didn’t want her to find out from somebody. i also did that coz i wanted to be open and show here that i trust her and that she can trust me. again, there are some things that are better left untold. right?
about not telling about your spouse’s physical appearance, there are times when you don’t tell the truth coz you don’t want him/her to get hurt. for me, the best-looking male actors would be Brad Pitt, George Clooney & Orlando Bloom.
I think I need to discover myself deeper…
Ang macho umiyak ng BF ko. Nakaka turn-on talaga.
I know a few male friends who groom. My brother uses facial wash more often than I do!
This is a very interesting article, and I know a few friends who’re like those mentioned above.
I’m guilty on 8/10 instances. haha
lol, totoo halos lahat ng to for me, except I don’t groom or preen.. and yes, I account for roughly 70% of the sasquatch sightings in the Tomas Morato area
Of course, most of these don’t apply to Chuck Norris… Chuck Norris’ tears could cure cancer… but Chuck Norries doesn’t cry. Ever.
haha! all these are true… well i think so. kasi maybe guys are afraid of being noticed about these things when they admit it… ako ayoko i-admit yun specially kung alam ko na yung pagsasabihan ko nito ay pagtatawanan ako. i mean sa guys, parang pag-inadmit mo ito sa another guy, iba ang tingin sayo. hahaha! ganun yun para sakin.
that’s 8/10 for me… but i think everything really are true
@dheena - syempre, pag hindi sya macho umiyak then baka myembro sya ng federasyon. hehe..just kidding.
@jam - most of my guy friends perform their grooming rituals with matching paraphernalia.
@dre - i think most guys are guilty of most of these things, like me.
@jerick - same here.
@jorge - so you’re the missing link? chuck norris? he was the reason why zinedine zidane headbutted Marco Materazzi. he threated zidane . hehe
@mark - you have a point. men do these things but they don’t want the general public to see them or know that they do it. they want to maintain that “macho” image.
@gbert - i think most of the guys who commented here admit to 8/10.