In The Beginning

13 Aug 2006 ·

Humor



In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God’s great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, “You want chocolate with that?” And Man said, “Yes!” and Woman said, “and as long as you’re at it, add some sprinkles.” And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure
that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

So God said, “Try my fresh green salad.” And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, “I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them.” And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it “Angel Food Cake,” and said, “It is good.” Satan then created chocolate cake and named it “Devil’s Food.”

God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.And Satan created McDonald’s and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, “You want fries with that?” And Man replied, “Yes! And super size them!” And Satan said, “It is good.” And Man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. Then Satan created HMOs.

A friend of mine sent this thru email. It may seem funny but it’s true. If you get to think of it, it’s exactly what’s happening today. So many people have weight problems and illnesses caused by or related to diet and nutrition. As the saying goes, “Health is Wealth”. When we are sick or have health problems, our whole lives are affected. We can’t work, we can’t play. We can’t enjoy or have fun. And also, we spend our money in going to the doctor or hospital. So being healthy is really important.

The sense of taste is one of the most difficult senses to control. I myself have a difficult time controlling my appetite. I love to eat pizza, cheeseburgers, chocolate chip cookies, ice cream, macaroni and cheese, etc. I know it’s not good for my health but I can’t stop eating them coz they taste so good! But with the help of my wife, I’ve started changing/improving my diet. I eat less of these “junk food” and eat more vegetables and fruits. Once in a while I still indulge myself with the “prohibited” food but I make sure that I keep myself within the limits.

Here are two links that talks about what the Bible has to say about Diet and Health.


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Written by Jaypee Habaradas
Owner and editor of JaypeeOnline. Self-proclaimed geek. New media writer and consultant. WordPress advocate. Loves blogging, gadgets, video games and sports. You can follow him on Twitter @jaypee or Facebook.
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9 Responses to “In The Beginning”

  1. juls PHILIPPINES Internet Explorer Windows Says:

    oo nga ano…. well gluttony is a cardinal sin…

  2. mark PHILIPPINES Internet Explorer Windows Says:

    nice story… yep, it’s funny yet true. And I thank God for giving me such high metabolism. hehe… and good thing I really dont like these things… I’m very unusual. though one thing I admit, Satan made computers so I’d sit in front of it for so many hours.. .haha!

  3. Jaypee UNITED STATES Flock Windows Says:

    @trench – so krispy kremes is your weakness huh? :D

    @piolo – exactly. thanks!

    @ang-ang – a little Bible study won’t hurt, right? ;)

    @aurea – i’m not really into donuts, but pizza? definitely! hehe

    @toe – McDonald’s and Ben & Jerry’s aren’t Satan, but in this parody, Satan created this stores to produce junk food. Yup, it’s definitely the Western diet that has more unhealthy foods.

    @paul – amen to that! God bless you too.

  4. pauL AUSTRALIA Mozilla Firefox Windows Says:

    our body is the temple of God so we better take good care of it…

    God bless!

  5. Toe CAMBODIA Safari Mac OS Says:

    That e-mail is funny. McDonald’s and Ben and Jerry’s as Satan… haha! Or you can also say that it’s the Western diet that’s wreaking havoc on our healths. I, too, am an eating sinner.

  6. aurea UNITED STATES Internet Explorer Windows Says:

    Donuts, pizza… they taste so good!

    I try not to have even a little of these – once I start, I’ll just crave junk food!

  7. Ang-ang PHILIPPINES Internet Explorer Windows Says:

    Okay little bible study in here ;-)

  8. piolo UNITED STATES Internet Explorer Windows Says:

    yes i agree we should eat responsibly, we only take food that are healthy, if not should be taken moderately.

    cool blog!

  9. trench GUAM Mozilla Firefox Windows Says:

    no fair crispy cremes! That will add loads to my tire!! lol. Its almost gone too! I dont want it back!

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